Dads give guidance to their sons and moms guidance their daughters. But particularly as girls mature, they need their dads’ perspective as they approach significant crossroads. Daughters need the benefit of their dads’ life experiences and wisdom as they consider important life decisions and think through possible consequences of their choices.
Your daughter also needs to know that you cherish her as a person and you admire her as a lovely young woman. She isn’t just another person; she is special and unique, and worthy of your attention. She is royalty. Your love maybe what it takes for her not to fade into the shadows of darks wondering around looking for hope. She needs you to be a dad not a stranger perpetrating to be someone he’s not.
Begin today by loving her with a simple phone call, taking her to lunch or better yet a hug.
David A. Harris-Gavin
Blended Families face Unique Challenges
The image of the traditional American family — the nuclear family of the Clevers and Huxtables — was once limited to mom, dad, and children living happily together under roof. Today the notion of a typical family has gradually expanded to included blended families of stepparents and stepchildren, like the Bradys and the Kardashians.
Blended families are one of the fastest growing segments of families in the United States, but unlike the nicely packaged problems seen on Television, these families struggle with issues that are anything but easy. Major issues that newly blended families face include integrating discipline styles and coping with strong emotions, while at the same time building new relationships from scratch.
“It’s hard to step out of that role – am I a friend or am I a parent? But as an adult, you’re the parent, you have to discipline because there are going to be times that they’re with you alone,” said New York psychologist Dr. Janet Taylor in an interview with “Good Morning America.”
“Come from a nurturing standpoint, where you teach them responsibility, but do it from a place of love.”
Yes, love is a key factor but the major role begins with the new couple and what they have agreed upon before they said I do. If you begin to look at why the child or children are acting out, you may have a better understand on how to solve the issues at hand. First they have suffered a great loss in loosing the other parent and secondly adjustment doesn’t come over night. Continue to esteem your mate but at the same time don’t stop showing affection for all your children.
David A. Harris-Gavin
Your son will return but will you receive him with open arms. The Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) gives us God’s response to a rebellious child. Possibly the hardest guideline to follow in this story is how the father allowed his son to take his inheritance and make his own choices. He did not run after his son and beg him to return, nor did he continually berate him for his foolish ways. His son was of age and solely responsible for his actions (Deuteronomy 24:16, Proverbs 1:29-31). This doesn’t mean that the father didn’t love his son. In verse 20 we are told that he saw his son returning from along way off. This implies that his father was watching for his son daily, dearly hoping for him to return and repent. This is not easy but, if we have shared the Gospel and the instructions that the Bible has given us with our children, the final decision to live a Godly life lies with each individual.
My biological mother passed some 14 years ago and during her sickness my stepmother always made herself available. Now, I’m older, wiser and truly understand the importance of family.
My stepmother loves me unconditionally just like the Lord; despite my faults. Now, it’s my turn to be a blessing to her by assisting my half-siblings to care give for her. Oh, what a blessing…
Can you forget about yourself and bless a family member in spite of how they may have treated you growing up? Just a thought!
Blended families have several challenges and barriers. One serious problem that escalates out of control is the way the new husband and wife feels about their kid(s). Better known as the Kid Factor! Each is committed to his or her own flesh and blood, while they’re merely acquainted with the other(s). The problem is when kid(s) sense tension between the parents, they will use it as an opportunity to exploit the situation to their advantage. Therefore, set boundaries for both sets of siblings. Discuss between husband and wife who should handle the discipline and how. Then share these new rules with everyone. I like to call the Barrier Dissolver! Just remember love is the key to barrier breaker.
Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value.Albert Einstein
A Man of Value is reflected through the mirror of Character and the heart of Love. Let’s represent as we move forward into a 2013.
During this holiday season that’s mean’t for rejoicing, fun and quality family time. Being in a blended family with all its different facets can bring on the blues and unneeded stress.
Here are some suggestions:
1. Don’t take on others problems.
2. Have everyone in the family Participate.
3. Love overcomes all situations.
4. Find something you love and that’s relaxing to do.