Building stronger bonds by sharing family values

Archive for April, 2015

Set yourself free


The power to unlock the door of a negative state is in your hand. It’s called the key of positive thinking and life.  Set yourself free today from whatever has you bound.

“I am living in hell from one day to the next. But there is nothing I can do to escape. I don’t know where I would go if I did. I feel utterly powerless, and that feeling is my prision. I entered of my own free will, I locked the door, and I threw away the key.” 

― Haruki Murakami

Abuse is Real pt2


“There were probably many factors that kept the relationship going and kept your love alive. There were all his promises. “I promise this will never happen again.” You believed him the first time. And the second. As the abuse continued, he became increasingly remorseful, his promises more insistent. You continued to believe him; you wanted to believe him. After all, you loved him. 

Then there were all the apologies. He seemed truly sorry. You forgave him. Now, however, when you think back, you realize the apologies were conditional. They blamed you! “I’m sorry, but if only you hadn’t…” They always made his abuse somehow your fault. You may have begun to believe this, and you may even remember apologizing to him. You began to believe that if you were careful about what you said or did, you could prevent the abuse from happening again. As the abuse escalated over time, the blaming became more obvious. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, but if you just weren’t so [stupid, ugly, careless, dumb, etc.], this would never have happened.” Time after time you were made to believe that every act of violence or abuse was your fault. Day after day you were made to feel that you were unworthy of him.” 
― Meg Kennedy DuganIt’s My Life Now: Starting Over After an Abusive Relationship or Domestic Violence

Take pride in who you are.  Domestic Violence goes both ways.  Begin to respect yourself today!

Abuse is real!


If you or someone you know are in an abusive relationship encourage them to seek help.  

Benefits of being an active father


The importance of being a father is not limited to the benefits to children. In fact, research has found that having a positive father involvement carries benefits for men as well.

Fathers have much to benefit from their relationships with their children. A few of the main benefits for involved fathers:

  • More developed sense of self and self-confidence Greater ability to care for others; a more mature understanding of empathy
  • An increased ability to express and demonstrate positive emotions Increased ability to delay gratification in benefit of others 
  • A greater participation in the community Larger involvement in the church 

A greater sense of well-being and personal satisfaction Source: “The Effects of Father Involvement: A Summary of the Research Evidence,” Father Involvement Initiative Ontario Network, Fall 2002 newsletter; and Glen Palm, “Involved Fatherhood: A Second Chance,” Journal of Men’s Studies, November 1993. 

“The guys who fear becoming fathers don’t understand that fathering is not something perfect men do, but something that perfects men.” —Frank S. Pittman, M.D. 

The Pressures of Life from the Eyes of a Disable Person


Pressures of life as a disable person will force you to view life situations differently then when you were totally healthy. Disabilities can affect you in many forms such as; Emotionally, Physically, Financially and Spiritually. After having several major surgeries on my spine, and being wheel chair bound, I felt emotionally battered, in a physical pit, financial rut and spiritually bankrupted.

This had altered my life in ways, which I never would have expected as a man. Part of me wanted to give up! A good friend made this statement to me: “By faith do you believe that your car will start once you place the key in to the ignition and turn it?” I answer yes! Well why you can’t believe that by faith you are healed. Even if I was to never rise up out of my new chair there is hope.

Today, giving up is not an option. By faith and connecting with other disable men and women I realize I’m whole by the grace of God. I just had to change my mind set, and become proactive in facing challenges face on. I endured therapy for several months along with crying and praying. I can say it has paid dividends. I’m up walking and back in the gym. The good news here is, I don’t know what the future holds but today I am standing on the word of the Lord by faith.

God desire to use your “Disability for his Ability!” You’re not alone. Whatever the situation maybe there is a plan that will workout for your good.

Become an encourager that encourages others!

David A. H. Gavin

Dgavin921@gmail.com

Twitter: @blended_family

www.blendedfamaffair.wordpress.com

Best of Marriages


“The very best of marriages Are made by best of friends, Who face together, hand in hand, The good and bad life sends. They aren’t afraid to share The deepest feelings of the heart, And respect each other’s needs To  spend some time apart. They support each other faithfully When troubles come their way, They don’t blame in haste or anger, But who love in what they say. They make marriage like true friendship Full of deeds that show they care, And they find a world of happiness In all the love they share”. —Amanda Bradley

Step Mom’s Rocks


Despite the challenges that come along with a marriage, being a step-mom also does.  She has to accept the responsibility of raising her own children as well as her husbands.  These experiences change moment by moment.  

I give tribute to my wife for allowing the Grace of God to lead her through raising our eight children from ages 9-32.  I say Step Mom’s Rock because this is one playbook that changes right before your eyes.

Be encourage even on the days when you strongly desire to throw in the towel.  God and other step moms are available to help you endure the good, bad and the ugly.

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